:: here's to a new season ::

Hey peeps :)

I've moved.

Here's to a new season. *cheers*

In case you didn't get it : http://elliechua.wordpress.com

See you there!

:: eye-opening ::

OA was brilliant.

I'm exhausted, but happily so :)

Highlights :
#1. The 3.5 hour hike in was no joke. The 3 hour hike out was better. Somewhat. But still not a joke. *predicts that Ellie will be bedridden in the morning*
#2. It was fun sleeping in the hut. Even if i *did* wake up multiple times to yelping dogs, crowing roosters and the fact that the hut moved everytime someone walked/sat/stood up.
#3. OA services are awesome. The worship especially :)
#4. Preaching in front of people you don't know, in a language you only used back in your hometown, plus KIDS running all over the place, was very interesting.
#5. Bathing in the river is not my cup of tea. It was a hair-standing experience. Lol. I was the only one who came out *bright* pink from head to toe.
#6. Baby "lurs" (wildboar) run kids over. Literally.
#7. My little brown boy. Ah, i miss that cute little fat face. He's unsaved. Will have to keep praying for him :)
#8. OA kids have the shortest attention span ever. I am no match for them.
#9. I didn't get to cook for OA. But we sure had good food :D Mah Ling rocks.
#10. A great team :) Ah, the funny moments will definitely be cherished. "What happens in OA, stays in OA....for awhile." ;)
#11. I pooped under the stars :D After half an hour of choosing the *perfect* spot.

Last but not least...

#12. I miss it already :(

Elder Joy was right. You'll always feel a lil' bit of something when you leave OA to the normal routine of *life*. I had to jump straight into assignments. Which, i can't put it in any other way but "sucks".

It was nice tho...living without having a phone beeping. Or a watch to tell you what time it is. It was nice being away from the lappie. It was nice...taking it slow.

I think i speak for every other OA team and my own when i say that it's an experience worth going for. Worth every cent, sweat and energy. And sleep too (considering how i was rushing my assignments before going).

Bottomline : I'd go again :)

:: excitings ::

I'm so excited. I am! I am! I am! *bounces*

Wheeeeee!!!! Ellie's going for OA!!!! *beams*

Shucks. I'm so excited sampai tak boleh tidur. Macam mana laaaaaa....

*grins*

*heads to bed and dreams of chasing wildboars*

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To the rest of you city people, be goods now! ;)
...and do pray for the team who's going out. Elder Joy, Lucas, BenJi, Eunice, Yvonne and i! We need your prayers ;) Thank you!

:: mulling over ::

3 down, 1 more to go. Oh, and one presentation on Tuesday too.

I got so caught up with the busy-ness of assignments, i didn't even get the opportunity to get excited for OA. Sure, it was somewhere in the back of my head, but this was/is something that i've looked forward to since....the beginning of last year!

Then, i was planning my schedule to go for OA in a time that was *convenient* for me to go.

How ironic it is that i'm now going at a time where i'm most bogged down in the semester. *smirks*

Ah, God. Your thoughts and Your ways are definitely higher than mine. I pray that i'll go in peace, knowing that there's still one more assignment to hand in. Consolation : it's only worth 10%. Note the only. *grin*

We will fly way up high
Where the cold wind blows
Or in the sun, laughing and having fun
With the people that she knows
And if the situation should keep us separated
You know the world won't fall apart
And you will free the beautiful bird
That's caught inside your heart

Can't you hear her?
Oh she cries so loud
Casts her wild note
Over water and cloud

That's the way it's gonna be, little darlin'
We'll be riding on the horses, yeah
Way up in the sky, little darlin'
And if you fall I'll pick you up, pick you up

Don't worry 'bout a thing little girl
Because I was young myself not so long ago
And when I was young, when I was young
And when I was young, oh I was a wild, wild one.
-Horses-Rickie Lee Jones-

I'm excited now. Am looking forward to the during and the afters.

Whee!

**********************************************************

On another note, you've changed. *thoughtfully* I can't put my finger on what it does to me though. Oh wells.

:: ta-da! ::

..."keep running, running..." *sings to the tune of Dory's song in Finding Nemo*

*grin*

I'm not crazy, i'm just a little unwell. *nods solemnly*

Thank you for the stuffies all the way from US. Am enjoying my storybook and CD's :)

Who says good things come in small packages? *beams*

:: what can i do ::

I'm tired.

There's only so much I can take
And I just got to let it go
And who knows I might feel better, yeah
If I don't try and I don't hope.

Maybe there's nothing more to say
And in a funny way I'm calm
Because the power is not mine
I'm just going to let it fly.
-What Can I Do-The Corrs-

How do you not get affected by words? Whether if its verbal or written?
How do you know if someone really means what he or she says?
How do you ignore paper cuts?
How do you make a difference in the little things?
How do you cling unto things and people even though they disappoint?

I know i need a break. We all do, sometimes. But, Lord, i think i may have forgotten how to give myself one.

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; who can know it?" - Jeremiah 17:9

So harsh. So true.

:: 2 down, 2 more to go ::

Ah, Lord. Remind me again why i do what i do. It's 1.30am and once again i'm drawn to thoughts of how i need to depend on You.

For my two finished assignments...Lord, Your favor and blessings.

For my unfinished two assignments...Lord, Your strength.

For my untranslated OA message...Lord, Your wisdom.

For my short attention span to complete the above...Lord, Your patience.

For my lack of tact to those around me...Lord, Your love and grace.

For my wildest dreams and desires...Lord, Your will.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not in your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." - Proverbs 3:5-6

So i hold on.

:)

:: guarded ::

You're right. I've been overly sensitive lately. It's been some time since i was this raw. Maybe i'm just tired.

Lord, guard my heart and mind. I don't need distractions. Especially not now. Help me focus. On You. On school. On OA. On ministry. I don't need anything else. Only You.

Do you hear me, God? I need You.

You are the source of life
I can't be left behind
There's no one else like You
I will take hold of You

I need You, Jesus
To come to my rescue
Where else can i go?
There's no other name by
Which i am saved
Capture me with grace
I will follow You.

This world has nothing for me,
I will follow You.
-Rescue-Desperation-

************************************************
My hands are doing its yearly peel again. *wrinkles nose* It's got this prickly feeling =/ Me no like rough hands.

Ugh. I need to learn not to let my guard down.

:: stressed ::

One down, three more to go.

I don't even know how to start on this assignment that's due this Friday. Guess i'll just have to find out in...24 hours. *sighs*

And...i lost my thumbdrive with quite a number of important stuff in it. *sighs again*

*****************************************
On another note, i didn't mean to snap. *sadface*

You know and You see
The times of my defeat
When I fail to realize
Your kindness reaches
Through all my fragile fears
Of wasting any years
And I see You go beyond
My silent feelings

You took this fading heart
And softened every part
I'll rest in light of what
You've promised to me
-Even When-Jeremy Camp

Sigh, back to work.

:: sway ::

Goal was not achieved.

I talk to you as to a friend
I hope that's what you've come to be
It feels as though we've made amends
Like we found a way eventually

I don't wanna hurt you
I don't wanna make you sway
Like I know I've done before
I will not do it anymore
I've always been a dreamer
I've had my head among the clouds
Now that I'm coming down
Won't you be my solid ground?

I look at you and see a friend
I hope that's what you wanna be
Are we back now where it all began
Have you finally forgiven me?
-Sway-The Perishers

Ironman was worth it. Trust me.

***************************************************
I'll try not to be so muddled next time. (refers to previous posts) Braindumps help, y'know. Somewhat. I hope.

:: that's my goal ::

Contrary to that insanely *pop* Shayne Ward song, no, my goal is NOT to win the heart and soul of a girl.

Spirited by chocolate and a whole lotta' prayer, I'm gonna attempt to do the impossible.

Goal :
#1. Complete MGW3401 Assignment. 3000 words. Progress : Started with 0 words at 10am this morning.
#2. Translate half of my OA message into BM. Progress : Nil.

Reward :
IRONMAN TONIGHT.

Bwahahahhaa.

Go, Ellie, go!! :D *cheers self with pompoms*

Now, where's my personal cheerleader when i need him? :P

:: yearnings ::

Today...was interesting.

If yearnings went away, what do we have to offer up to God? Aren't they given to us to offer up to Him in the first place?

It is the control of passion, not its eradication, that is needed.

How else can we learn to submit to the authority of Christ if we have nothing to submit?

Sigh, Lord, what if i don't want to mature? What if...what if...

Ughs. My thoughts are all over the place. Don't mind me.

**************************************************
Edited : Some people just don't know how much they hurt others by their insensitivity. Sigh, little deaths.

Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we should've learnt somehow.

:: somehow or rather ::

Welcome to the days of wariness
Where I'm feeling an echo inside my chest
I've a heart beating patiently along
Waiting for the other half of its song

And times have told the ways things come to light
Realizing a lack in your will to fight
Despite words crying inconsistencies
As you fall uneasily to your knees

No, it's not enough
Don't touch my hand and call it love
If you can't hold it tight tonight
If you're not strong enough

I'm not blind to what you're doing here
Make me feel like I'm special, but my dear
I have seen through a weakness in your eyes
You don't know it but you're telling me lies

You will soon wake to see
There is no heart in anything you say to me
Thought we'd found a harmony
A perfect match of melodies
But if you listen closely now, I've been singing all alone

No, it's not enough
Don't touch my hand and call it love
If you can't hold it tight tonight
If you're not strong enough
-Strong Enough-Kina Grannis-

***************************************************

Note to self : Today, i am.

:: stretched ::

4 assignments due in the span of 2 weeks. What with OA in between. It's gonna be crazyyyyy.

Ellie wants to watch Ironman. She didn't want to earlier, but now she does. *nods*

***********************************************
Oooh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
It's hard to get by just upon a smile
Oooh, baby, baby, it's a wild world
And i'll always remember you like a child, girl...
-Mr Big-

Shucks. I'm in my nineties mode again. Bring on Pearl Jam & Duran Duran. Heck, maybe even No Doubt too. Let's rock tonight :D